You've tried everything except that "thing" you're addicted to..... and it doesn't really matter what it is, believe me when I say "it doesn't matter what it is"!
The problem is not the addiction, but rather what you "do."
Anyway, it's not going away. As a result, you begin looking for solutions from other sources. Nicotine patches, self-help books, step programmes, and articles like this one come to mind.
Don't get me wrong: these are all things that can be useful. They prepare you for the "ultimate epiphany" that will help you overcome your addiction for good.
You make agreements with yourself. "I'm useless because I can't manage this" or "If I don't have (insert your particular addiction here) today, I'll be able to have one tomorrow." "I'm in such a foul mood today that I need my little helper." Perhaps your inner voice tells you that no one understands how difficult it is, or that you are simply more sensitive than others, or that it makes you intriguing, or that my friends wouldn't like me any other way, or that....
We can go in circles for years, substituting one addiction for the next. Everyone is to blame for our troubles. "I was an unloved child," she says. "My father was an alcoholic," she adds. Does this ring a bell? Please don't misunderstand me. Being the child of an alcoholic is a huge responsibility! I'm not dismissing it, any more than I'd dismiss anything that someone believes is the source of their addiction.
But, and this is where the issue arises. If you "think" that something external set you on the route to oblivion, you'll need an equally powerful external tool to get you to change your mind. It's not going to happen, I'm afraid! There is nothing outside of you that can change your path. Please accept my apologies, but that is the truth.
You can justify, lie, blame others, and spend a fortune on self-help gurus all you want until you realise one basic truth:
Stopping your addiction is the key to overcoming it. Yes, please halt! and the point is that you won't unless you realise the solution to your problem is within you.
Fear is preventing you from reaching out to the part of yourself that can assist you. Whatever you do to alleviate that dread, "your addiction" prevents you from hearing that wise part of yourself.
The key is to identify fear for what it is.
Recognize that it is preventing you from hearing your inner voice.
You've been duped into thinking your terror is as deep as it can get. The terror is only superficial. Make the choice to Stop, Stay the Course, and Move On. If you feel the need to, you can figure out how you got into this situation once the thing you're doing "your addiction" is no longer ruling you. Isn't it also possible to just carry on with your life?
Remember! You are the answer to the question! The key to stopping is to simply stop!
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